I’ve been with the love of my life Melissa for a little over 4 months now, and things are pretty great I think. To hear the kinds of things come from her mouth about how much she loves me gives me a warm feeling inside that makes the world around me melt away. We love each other so much at this point if we were to break up for any reason, one or both of us would be extremely devastated to the point where you would want to watch us closely for fear of what we might do alone. That’s something that has crossed my mind a couple of times, kind of an awkward thing to think about, but it’s true. But this is also good because that means that we could stay together forever if things stayed anywhere near to the way they are now. For me now the biggest struggle is trying to not get too complacent and continue to try and be amazing for her. Of course if I wasn’t trying to save money this would make things a bit easier in that department. But Melissa is great and we are pretty much meant to be together if you ask me so I’m just really happy that I found her at this point.
Elsewhere in life I work a lot and that’s going pretty great, I am appreciated and have actually made some friends since starting there. My time as a cashier is actually really nice and bussing makes pretty good money so it works out nice that I split most of my time doing those two jobs. I just need to keep striving to not fuck up and I think I’ll be alright.
I am saving my money that I don’t use for rent/utilities at my new place towards getting a new car between july 17 and july 31 (both paydays) using my money saved as a down payment and making payment of around $175/month for 60 months (crosses fingers). Of course I need a legit co-signer to get a loan and what not, but hopefully it works out and I can actually get a nice car for myself. I am really excited to get my new car and drive it all the time, yet not have to pay more in gas cause my car is just that bad on gas (yes, I drive a POS right now). Hoping for a 2002 - 2004 Honda Civic with around 50k miles on it, but we will see what happens. I’m doing research and looking hardcore, it should pay off in the long run.
I have serious sleep issues…….really like “wtfomgbbq!!!” bad. One hour minimum before I pass out most nights, with sometimes when two hours isn’t enough, such as this past weekend. I don’t even get it most of the time, but my thoughts don’t end and they just kill me slowly. I really need this looked at cause it’s been hanging around pretty much ever since I’ve been in high school, maybe before.
I love my music, it's pretty much amazing. Just saying.
I really want to start like a personal journal thing for myself that I do at least a little bit on every night. Yeah it’s not possible, but I really would like to do it for my own record keeping. Also there is a lot of stuff that crosses my mind that I forget so that would help a lot. Then there is also some personal thoughts I want to record cause I don’t want to pay the money to see a therapist/need to get off my mind, but definitely can’t post online. I would hope to be able to consolidate journal thoughts into posts online or just take particular write happy days and post them online (that I feel I can post online anyways). Maybe I will start this up tomorrow even………yeah sounds like a good plan.
And 1,
Alexander
1 comment:
You SHOULD do this more often. Srsly.
And insomnia will come and go. I've had it since middle school. It's brutal, but not unbeatable. Just don't get frustrated, be content with rest if sleep is elusive, and stay positive.
-Carsten
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